straight boys are weak and pathetic, queer girls walk into the ladies changing room and see ten women naked, do they stare? do they say something inappropriate? do they make…
Wow you just don’t quit do you? Did I say they aren’t responsible for their actions? No I did not. I did not type those words. I’m starting to get really fucking pissed off with this, you’re all either putting words into my mouth or not even answering and sending stupid GIFs.
And when did I say that you shouldn’t correct misogynistic behaviour? Do you have eyes?
If a guy had posted ‘women are weak and pathetic because they can’t cope with a little banter’ or some such thing, they would be fucking annihilated and rightly so. I was originally pointing out that differentiating between lesbian girls and straight boys is stupid for a multitude of reasons that I have posted over and over again. You’re wrong, you’re being prejudice, it’s as simple as that.And do me a favour, that’s exactly what floozys is doing. She has made it very clear that she thinks misandry is acceptable. I’ve looked at her blog.
Now kindly think before you type and stop trying to justify your warped perspective with statistics on rape culture and body same. That’s not the point.
I did not say you didn’t say they are responsible; I stressed heavily on their responsibility because I find the way to handle it is by letting them know it’s wrong. *yawn* I don’t care how others have responded to you; I’m addressing you on my blog.
No, of course you didn’t say we shouldn’t correct behavior, but if you get into this much of a fit over someone venting, I’m going to probably disagree with your methods.
Yes, a man would be taken to task and he should be, because he’s raised to believe it’s okay; we are all raised in a sexist society. When a woman posts something like that, it is retaliation; we do not live in a matriarchy, a man does not experience sexism, merely the effects of a male-ruled society.
I’m not being prejudiced, it’s just a fact that people are capable of keeping their hands to themselves. Your chromosomes are unimportant in that regard. It is not 'stupid’ (lovely ableism, by the way), it’s showing the different standards with which we hold groups.
'Misandry is acceptable’. Misandry isn’t real, but okay, this has been fun.
straight boys are weak and pathetic, queer girls walk into the ladies changing room and see ten women naked, do they stare? do they say something inappropriate? do they make them uncomfortable? no because…
That’s not a sweeping generalisation, that’s a biological fact!
Also I’m well aware of the horrifying statistics about rape culture. I’m just as angry and upset as you are. I don’t feel comfortable walking home by myself. I pay ten quid to get a taxi to and from work every day because of it.
But singling out young boys as being ‘weak and pathetic’ is the most reductive and tenuous statement. Why not say something constructive? Those 'pathetic’ boys are going to grow up and probably be nothing like their younger selves. They’re just kids. And comparing 'straight boys’ to 'queer girls’… Pfft, do me a favour. Like one sexuality is better than another.
The reason this statement has so many notes is because it’s bold and offensive, not because it has anything of real merit to say. You wan to fight misogyny, say something constructive.
No, it’s definitely not a biological fact that they can’t control their fucking actions when they’re aroused.
No one said 'young boys’ and do you really think they’re going to look at that and go 'oh God, yeah, i’m so pathetic’? No, because many will not take it seriously and/or will insist they’re not one of those men. A boy’s not going to lose all his self-esteem because someone on tumblr was calling out an issue. Furthermore, if their first reaction to someone else’s frustration about things they’ve encountered is having their own feelings hurt, there’s another problem.
“going to grow up and probably be nothing like their younger selves…” What world do you even live in if you think that not correcting a child’s actions will still lead to change? Complacency is as bad as outright support because it doesn’t teach them it is wrong.
No one said one sexuality was better than another, nice try though.
I find her post empowering, personally. It’s not 'shocking and offensive’; it’s recognition of something I live/have to deal with every day. And I really don’t even care if some man-children are angry about having it pointed out by others.
straight boys are weak and pathetic, queer girls walk into the ladies changing room and see ten women naked, do they stare? do they say something inappropriate? do they make them uncomfortable? no because they have the common fucking…
I won’t stand for double standards. You can’t be a feminist and making sweeping generalizations about heterosexual males at the same time. It’s about equality. I’ve already pointed out the many flaws with this militant brand of feminism last night.
“sweeping generalizations about heterosexual males”
You did a fine job assuming that they’re so hormone ridden that they can’t control themselves.
You’re right, it is about equality, which is why they need to be held accountable for their actions and not have them swept under the rug.
Jesus, obviously not every single man acts that way; floozys is aware of that, I’m aware of that, WE’RE ALL AWARE OF THAT. I even remember being taught in English class to get rid of the unnecessary words like ‘most people’ and just say 'people’. Besides, you’re missing the entire fucking point.
Because in society, men are excused for their actions and this happens every single day. Yet you sit here focused on the fact that the wording wasn’t “some men”, not on the fact that approximately 1 in 5 women are sexually assaulted, many people feeling too ashamed to report the incident. You don’t focus on the fact that we as a society are breeding boys to not even believe they’ve assaulted someone, that it was actually wanted by the victim/survivor. We live in a society where we teach girls to be ashamed of their bodies and to cover them at any cost because we force sexualization on them. We teach them that if they don’t follow the rules of covering themselves, or staying with friends while they’re out, or not drinking, then it is their fault they were attacked.
But you’re going to sit here and say 'but what about the straight men?! someone has to stand up for them!’ The whole world stands up for them; everything is tipped dramatically in their favor.
straight boys are weak and pathetic, queer girls walk into the ladies changing room and see ten women naked, do they stare? do they say something inappropriate? do they make them uncomfortable? no because they have the common fucking sense to recognise when a…
Maybe those ‘queer girls’ are more respectful because they have to be, because they would probably be completely ostracised for giving away any hint of being interested or aroused. Also they are more familiar with the female anatomy than boys are. That would be the reason that they can make the distinction between a sexual and non sexual situation. Boys are big bag of hormones and if they’re inexperienced, they have probably never seen a naked woman in the flesh. Get some perspective and try not to sound like a man hating harpy.
However getting death threats and stuff is totally uncool. I really hate how people use the internet to bully. It’s pathetic and cowardly.
And yet isn’t amazing that I, having never seen a naked man in the flesh, can control my fucking gaze and voice so as not to be disrespectful if I find someone attractive? I know when a situation is sexual and when it is not, and 'boys will be boys’ is not an acceptable excuse for them; they will be held accountable for their actions, or there will never be any change. Attitudes like yours are what fuel their self-entitlement.
You’re also assuming that all girls have the same anatomy and that all boys have the same anatomy (not to mention those outside of the binary), and that isn’t just about penises and vaginas either; people look different, we are varied. You may have some assumptions about someone else’s body, but you are not familiar with the vast majority of them.
I don’t know why you’re just calling boys a 'big bag of hormones’, like do you not realize that damn near everyone is feeling that way when they grow up? And what about all the men that have grown up and out of that and still don’t have any decency, that have no respect for women? What about those gross men who catcall from their cars, regardless of how much skin you are or aren’t showing? What about the men who will throw a hissy fit if you turn them down? They sure do love to call you a slut if you have anything showing, and a frigid bitch if you don’t.
But I just love how you reduce the anger and frustration and fear of being objectified into someone sounding like a 'man hating harpy’, as if that’s what should be the topic of concern anyway. I refuse to pander to the feelings of those who would demean me and no one should feel that they have to. Get rid of the tone policing and try focusing on the actual issues.
I just realized that the only time non-minority people use the word ‘ally’ to describe themselves is when queer issues are on the table. You don’t see people say, “I’m a total ally for POC/poor/disabled/etc. groups!” Interesting…
Is it because 'activism’ for queer people is considered fashionable and, as a byproduct, we thus have people rushing to identify themselves with it? Is it because we seem like the easiest minority to deal with (considering many outlets seem to think the only thing in our way is marriage equality and have also never considered intersectionality)?
Before I get jumped, I understand that many people who use the label on themselves are well-meaning, but it honestly rubs me the wrong way a bit. My big issue with self-identifying as an ally is that it’s just not the way things work. 'Ally’ is a title you earn from someone (who is part of the oppressed group) that THEY are free to describe you with.
It’d be like some random guy introducing himself as a 'gentlemen’. Like excuse you, but we’ve just met, I know nothing of your behavior, and you’re already trying to tell me how good of a person you must surely be? It’s MY experience with you that decides if you are truly befitting of that title.
I’m all for putting something up that says you’re a safe space and/or that you’re positive, but a knight isn’t a knight until someone deems them worthy by their actions.
I know I have a lot of minority (most notably, fellow LGBTQ) followers and I’m really curious about your thoughts on this. Perhaps someone will have more to add to the 'lack of ally badges for other groups’ tangent…I’m far too tired right now to attempt tackling of that with some of my other minority labels.
Confession #10:
I would love for Adam and Eddy to explore Regina’s feelings for Emma as I believe she is falling in love with her and it would be beautifully heartbreaking to see Regina try and hide her feelings throughout season 3
You know why I had to reblog and love this so much? Well, of course it would be a heartstring-tugging thing to see, but it could also be done so realistically…
I think about a lot of queer fans and the way that many of us have had to hide the way we feel and/or have had a hard time coming to terms with our attractions and identity/ies. As far as we know, Regina (well, Emma too) has never found herself in a position of falling for another woman, and the psychological exploration they’d be able to give us through that could be beautiful (though it’d be even better if that was handled by a queer writer).
To me, it makes so much sense to think that Regina has been slowly falling for Emma, the one person who has (fairly) consistently been there to save and support her. Even when Season 1!Emma was hellbent on finding a way to expose Regina, I don’t feel like she ever wanted to really truly hurt Regina…she was just consumed with getting Henry.
I think Regina may very well see an opportunity to have a family with Emma, to have love with Emma, to have trust, strength, and happiness with Emma. If they talked it out, they would find that they relate on many levels and that they understand each other better than anyone else in their lives.
That’s all I want; a strong and realistic love between two complex characters.
So I’d wager that by now, most of you have seen the stills of Regina’s electroshock torture that they gave us in the promo…
I just…Seeing it in the promo was really intense and awful, but looking at the photos, I actually started to feel sick. I’m not squeamish, at all…But this…it’s just too much.
The torture itself is sickening, but I’m also completely in shock at how sexual the pre-torture shots are…Greg and Hook getting far too close, with hands placed far too intimately. I want to vomit each time I think about Greg stroking Regina’s hair.
The pictures alternate between showing me an overwhelming emptiness in Regina’s eyes and a sense of desperation. I can’t tell for sure, but it looks as if there is a tear in the corner of Regina’s eye as Greg looms over her. And she just looks so lost and at the mercy of everyone else in the room; there’s none of the fire that I’m accustomed to seeing in her eyes…and it’s all very upsetting.
We see Regina cry out of pain…a lot. But restricting as her years with Cora and Rumpelstiltskin were/are, we haven’t seen her so completely helpless (Henry’s coma was probably the closest). No magic. No control. No compassion.
I’m not entirely sure how to handle it…it’s just disgusting and heart-breaking. I mean, if you aren’t disturbed by this in some way or if you post about how she ‘deserves’ this, I won’t even be able to begin to understand how on earth you’ve come to that conclusion.
Now, I haven’t watched any of the sneak peeks as I make a point of avoiding them, but this imagery is plenty harrowing enough.
we just want to point out that we’ve seen an increase in these (and other less literate) anti-bisexual comments of this type
not sure why, we wonder if it is becasue so many bisexual people are getting more visible — even in just unremarkable and you would think benign, ways like books, bloggers, films, videos, webcasts, and lots of pictures and cute memes — as well as getting assertive about being included and standing up for their rights, but whatever it sure has ruffled some feathers
but look here people equality is not a finite thing - it doesn’t run out - you won’t get less if others get some too
the fact that we promote bisexual writers does not somehow mean lesbian authors are throwing up their hands and and walking away from their typewriters; our posting pictures of rose lavender and blue cupcakes does not cause gay men somewhere to have their desert menu taken away; stepping up to talk about how serious issues effect our little corner of the world isn’t separatism, it means we are taking responsibility, we are being good participating citizens of the Queer Nation; having the B in LGBT start to wake up and stand up too can only serve to assist the in the greater struggle and to increase the good for everyone
I honestly don’t know whether to laugh or cry at the “biphobia doesn’t exist” comment.
I mean, really?
REALLY?
Is it so difficult to concede that our lack of visibility in media is obvious? Is it so hard to see that when we are represented, it is rarely done in a positive way? Instead, being depicted as the naive she/he/xe that is either going through some rebellious period or is really still in the closet, because after all, it couldn’t possibly be that our range of attraction (whether they be sexual, romantic, or both) is outside of single gender. That’d just be plain silly!
What about the times when we are shown a bit more happily? Well, sorry if you’re wanting an actual statement from that character, because they’ll probably never drop the b-bomb on the actual show…No, they’ll either say ‘bi-curious’ because you’re just deciding what part of the dichotomy you fit into, or you’ll hear it from a show-runner in some single sentence acknowledgement in an interview or tweet.
Do you want to go out to a queer safe space or special event? Well, good luck feeling included because it’ll shortly be obvious that everyone will just use 'gay’ as the blanket term. Or perhaps you’ll be trying to be visible, and you’ll be met with people who refuse to hide their disbelief and disgust at what you are…The best part? That can come from the straight AND queer communities. Well, how about we set up our own space online? Oh, I guess we can’t do that because suddenly WE’RE not being inclusive enough. We’re devoting too much time to working to make our corner a visible one; not just a dimly lit portion of the room.
I need to see non-monosexuals highlighted here because I DON’T SEE THEM ANYWHERE ELSE. Because when I watch shows that I love, one of my favorite characters says she “might be bicurious” even when she’s happily been involved with literally everyone in the school, and because on that same show, another character I love said, “bisexual is just a term gay guys use in high school when they want to hold hands with someone and feel normal”. Sometimes there is a strong character I love, who hasn’t had many hints as to their sexuality, but then I see a tweet saying, “Oh, she’s happily bi!”…And as a bisexual woman, I don’t see it, because no one wants to show us that.
I need non-monosexuals highlighted here because we were there for Stonewall and we were then shunned from the honoring parade for years…even now, tensions are not completely diffused.
I need non-monosexuals highlighted because growing up, I didn’t even know there was a word for the way that I felt. No one told me that it was possible. “I must be a lesbian…but I don’t just like my gender, so what is wrong with me?” I asked myself this every. single. night. I had nowhere to go…I couldn’t even read about it at the library; I didn’t know what to look for!
I need non-monosexuals highlighted because there ARE well known and loved bisexuals in the world; they just never tell us that in our schoolbooks. How would I have fared if I had known about Eleanor Roosevelt, Frida Kahlo, Alice Walker, Marlon Brando, etc? What if I’d known growing up, that people who have been labelled as gay/lesbian, weren’t/arent? What if I’d known that about Freddie Mercury, Ani Difranco, even Andy Dick?
I need non-monosexuals highlighted here because the bisexual community has long worked with the trans* community and we are now being told that we are transphobic. I need a non-monosexual safe space because no one will listen to OUR definition of OUR orientation/preference.
Then again, we’re used to being silenced.
And that, my friend(s), is the biphobia we rage against.
This is belated, as I was constantly editing it.
My dear fellow Regals,
As I write this, it is Christmas Eve and the sounds of relatives chatting about desserts buzzes in the background; I’m thinking about the holiday church service I attended on the 22nd. It focused on why we lose the holiday spirit and how to find it once more. One of the pastor’s keywords was ‘peace’. I realize that the Evil Regals are a big bit of contentment for me, and I’m eternally grateful.